I always thought I would bring it up. I was so wrong. Maybe I wanted him to bring it up to avoid the decision. After all I was the one who brought up marriage. My mom keeps telling me I'm brutally honest on this blog, and I think well maybe, but I could be so much more so. I'm hesitant to even go in this direction due to the very intimate conversation that was had. But, my blog is about telling the world about my life as an emerging artist. And, this is significant.
We had the children discussion. Though we had it over a week ago over a slight buzz from some Chianti wine the timing has changed. Lee's turning 32 and I'm turning 30. We certainly are still very young, especially with many women having children at 35 +. But, I knew that was too late for me only because I don't want to be turning 60 when my kids are going to college.
I've always dreamed of being an artist and a teacher and a mom. Now that the last one is creeping closer to reality I have a lot of concerns and questions as an emerging artist. The main one is how will I have the space to paint and teach. We currently live in a tiny home which does have room for a studio or nursery. I could do both by purchasing a laptop, and somehow condensing all of my office supplies/files to a small space in the living room. Then there's the idea of renting an outside studio space which would really solve the problem. I have the opportunity to possibly share space with a local photographer. But, will I be able to cover the rent?
It's all very exciting as our lives could change significantly over the next year or so. I don't want to lose momentum in my career but being an artist does afford a lot of flexibility. I guess with every change in life you just have to dive in and have faith that everything will work out. And, like Lee says, there's never an ideal time.